December 19th 2010

One of my favourite things about Christmas, besides wrapping presents, is baking, well more like using cookie cutters and making my baking pretty. Yesterday I was in the mood for baking, so I went looking for our cookie cutters. However they were no where to be found. So Mother and I decided that wouldn't stop us and we went out to buy some, we barely found any, but we found a whole set of different sized snow flakes, so that was my first step on cookie making.

The cookies however decided to turn more into flowers when the baked, so some were christmas flowers and others were snowflakes.

Yesterday was actually what I needed, my dad upset me, again, and I was pretty close to having an anxiety attack, I went to find my mom, but she didn't pay any attention to me, I went to my younger brother because he saw me crying and he said "that's just dad" so at this point with my holiday spirit blown right out of me I had to go back to making cookies because I already had the dough made.

So instead of doing it because it was fun and exciting I was doing it because now it had to be done.

Then my other brother came up.

He's been going through a lot right now, and he was the one to make me feel better. He knew how I felt, he knew what to say, just the fact that he cared, when I didn't think he even liked me any more, made everything better for the time being. We talked, about stupid stuff, and about stuff that really mattered, he stayed there while I rolled the dough, cut it into snow flakes and baked them, now times that by at least six. I made a lot more cookies than I thought I was going to make, and it was becoming very late.

We stayed up and talked till past midnight, we sung disney songs together, taking turns being the guy and the girl. Searched them up on youtube, we laughed our asses off at some of the versions in other languages. We researched the voice actor of Hades, we talked about life, we watched square enix game's cut scenes, compared likes and dislikes, and just shared the time. It was wonderful, it just lifted the tension of my shoulders if only for that time being, and I shall cherish that moment, I hope he feels the same way I did.

Actually I never got around to icing the cookies until today, and that was a bitch, over fifty freaking cookies, all to be different and all to be pretty. But thanks to my mom who ate a bunch of them before I had to ice them. = P